Me being single is just a conspiracy! Thats because I get about as much attention as a white crayon. but it's just so blunt and funny. 75. 11. There are many other euphemisms you could use, though: Still ticking. Death is inevitablesome might even say it is a terminal inconvenience or a reason to suddenly stop sinning. How did you get here? Before I answer, I let you know that those who know my age get bad luck. 1. Just look what happened there! But, whats the likelihood of that happening? Your email address will not be published. Feeling confident? I'm used to it, anyway. (Use a sexy tone). Voice command: Alexa, I am your father. 3. 5. As Head Of Content Operations, Harini sets the tone and editorial direction for StyleCraze to deliver engaging, interesting, and authentic content revolving around women's health, wellness, and beauty. This might be okay if they take up to 24 hours, but not more than that. If you are not happy being single, then you will never be happy being in a relationship. Don Draper? 20 Funny Out-of-Office Messages to Inspire Your Own [+ Templates] - HubSpot Could be payday. Reply. The best I can be. At minding my own business? Stop asking me why Im single! Did someone leave your cage open? I just adore my own company. We cant always get what we want now, can we? Steven Wright (comedian), "What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death." Still with us. (Wriggle your hips), Oh, stop it, will you? What if questions can help you form connections fast, but you don't want to rush or force it. The answer is simple. A real low-life. You have an old soul. Thinking of you not existing makes me want to masturbate. Impressive! What should I doI like you too much. Check out: Image credits Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash. Make sure you give witty responses only to persons close to you, or you know they wont get offended by such responses. OK, so now at least you should have some idea of how to respond if your ex texts you out of the blue. You just live. Although for some, traveling to your partner might not be an option. Choose one of these responses to inject some life into your monotonous chats. It takes a specific kind of person to ghost someone its really not that hard to send a quick Im not interested text but rest assured, they exist. Now I have a much lower opinion of you. Whoever cast a voodoo spell on my love life can chill now. *Siri activates front camera*. My lawyer has stated that I dont have to answer that question. I havent found anyone who matches my kinks yet. It's one of the best replies to "How are you?" Hanging on. Same thing youre doing, talking to you now. 22. At least my hair looks amazing. Make sure the person you say this to is able to take a joke. 4. Not even the fussiest, or clingiest person in the world would expect a dead person to reply to them. You could reply with how you are doing and what has been keeping you busy lately. I firmly believe that a romantic relationship is a huge distraction. By acting as though they are replying too fast, you highlight the fact that they are replying too slow. The living are getting rarer. Eugene Lonesco (playwright), Dying is easy; its living that scares me to death. Annie Lennox (musician), If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the UP button. Sam Levenson (humorist), Ive looked that old scoundrel death in the eyes many times but this time I think he has me on the ropes. Douglas MacArthur (general), Those who welcome death have only tried it from the ears up. Wilson Mizner (playwright), The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades, especially if your teammates are bad guessers. Demetri Martin (comedian), I intend to live forever or die trying. Groucho Marx (comedian), Death is a very dull, dreary affair, and my advice to you is to have nothing whatsoever to do with it. William Somerset Maugham (author), The art of dying graciously is nowhere advertised in spite of the fact that its market potential is great. Milton Mayer (author), At my age, I do what Mark Twain did. Its too small to be out there all alone. When you show them how you're not affected by them at all, that's when your comedic skills become the best and make others laugh as well. What Can Be the Worst Epic Responses To I Love You? - Bonobology.com For a prankster, though, street signs or a note out in public is an easy opportunity to get a guaranteed audience for their smart . 13. I hope you like some of them. "Alright. Trying to understand the meaning of life or the universe at least. Why dont you tell me, you seem to have a pretty good view from there. It would be easy to answer that question with a simple "I'm fine, thank you.". If you don't want to explain how you're feeling, then don't. 47. Your email address will not be published. 61. 51. There's no reason why you should have to express emotions to whoever asked. 50. What a miracle. Maybe they had a giant project at work and lost contact with all their friends and loved ones. But if youre getting fed up with always being asked the same questions, you shouldnt feel bad about giving a funny or witty reply. No one loves superheroes. Im sorry I hurt your feelings. "I'll get back to you once I'm back from my long-awaited trip to the fridge.". #fyp #basketball #viral #fyp #viralvideo #funny #comedy". (bonus points to you if you sing it). As for me, I cant even afford honey! A A A Remember the time when you hated your ex too much that you wanted him dead? Which just make the unexpected moments of levity all the more hilarious. Maybe because I like pineapples on my pizza? 98. 8 Funny Replies To "Hahaha" Text Better Responses Ive never seen such a small mind inside such a large head before. Everyone has a different sense of humor. How do you want me to be? Ive seen your kind before but last time, I had to pay admission. Thats because theres no vacancy in my heart. Don't Push It Too Far. Are you still alive? Follow for more funny content!! #fyp #bask The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two." How much do you charge to deliver an STD? 16. The hottest single of the year is me. I dont mind you talking so much, as long as you dont mind me not listening. His songs often parodied popular musical forms, though they usually had original melodies. Perhaps it will encourage them to respond quicker in the future. funny response to are you still alive. Then they throw dirt in your face. (This line came from the cartoon show. 30. This is a good response to throw out there. | Are you surviving? You win the internet. Now, I understand why some animals eat their young. 38. You'll be asked how you are almost every single day, which is why you should add some humor to your answers. More like give me a sign that you're still alive. 3. Getting better with every passing second. Your 3rd @ has one shot to make a three or you die. 100. The following two tabs change content below. I was actually talking to my friend". 14. What is the most creative reply to, are you still alive? I don't want to give off the wrong impression.". [Read: 20 things you MUST know to master a dry sense of humor]. Youre supposed to think that theyre so busy being cool that they dont have time for you. For more information, please see our Real may recognize real, but real also recognizes thoughtless people who don't deserve your time. I hate looking at my life and seeing that some of the people that are most important to me aren't here anymore! Everyday that you're on the right side of the grass is a good day. [*clap your hands*]. For some reason, some people think that not texting back is cool. I once showed up twenty-four hours early for a date. 2. Maybe because I clap my hands when the credits roll at the end of a movie? Oof, gotta hide! Thats because my crush is a fictional character. Happy, and I know it. Are you going to help me have a good day? Looking for funny responses to everyday questions? However, the time it takes for a puppy to grow up is a lot longer than it should take for someone to reply to your message. Everyone wants me, but no one dares! I do admite that sometimes I hate life, sometimes my hate being in the world! For instance, have you hooked up since you've broken up? Your secrets are always safe with me. Herodotus (historian), "At my age, I do what Mark Twain did. While most of us answer with an uninspired I am fine, thank you, the universal greeting question how are you? 14. Want to equip yourself with more responses? I'm overqualified! Keep talking. So, it might be wise to double-check theyre still alive before you complain. Chuck Bass? Dont wake me up yet. 45 Funny Memes About Life in 2023 - Happier Human Why would he text me "Are you still alive?"? - GirlsAskGuys My psychiatrist says that I shouldnt discuss it with strangers. Elon Musk targets Sen. Bernie Sanders over tax tweet: 'I keep The Nine Canonical Responses to 'U Mad,' the - Intelligencer I text the same message ' are you alive' when I haven't heard from them in a while. Im always there when I need me. [Read: 30 foolproof pickup lines and 10 you should never ever use]. . Its the same reason why I dont post pictures of myself. 95+ Heartwarming Alive Jokes | buried alive, stayin alive jokes Scroll down! Joshua Burns, "Death is a delightful hiding place for weary men." You may also like: 30 Best Responses To An Apology For A Late Reply. Have a nice life." This text is excellent because you are making him or her feel guilty about ghosting you. Truth is, we all have ugly experiences with our past lovers. Funny as phuck. I was doing great, before you came. It could be raining men, and Id still be single. It lets him know that you love spending time together. Youre totally on the same page. 55+ Coronavirus Memes Funny Coronavirus Memes - Parade: Entertainment Edgar A Shoaff (author), "Death is a very narrow theme, but it reaches a wide audience." 93. is willie rogers of the soul stirrers still alive; cal berkeley football recruiting questionnaire; american housewife cancelled. It looks a little too clingy and hard to maintain. 100+ Funny and Clever Answers to "Why Are You Still Single?" Best 45 seconds of my life. 01 "I thought we were both adults but clearly, I was wrong. Giving witty and interesting responses instead of the generic Im fine is often the smartest way to kickstart a nice conversation after the greeting How Are You?. I've Tried, but No One Listens, If I Was Any Better, Vitamins Would Be Taking Me, Better than I Was a Minute Ago, Because You're Here, Okay, Because My Name Wasn't in Today's Obituaries. It may come across as insensitive, but that's just how our current world works. Youre like Monday: no one likes you. If ugliness was measured in bricks, I would be the Great Wall of China. 58. Photo by Glenna Rankin on reshot 02 "It has been a while since I've heard from you, and at this point, I'm over it." Watch the video: Only 1 percent of our visitors get these 3 grammar questions right 30 Best Responses To An Apology For A Late Reply. Check out the following infographic for some practical tips to maintain a conversation and take it forward.SaveIllustration: StyleCraze Design Team. See more ideas about maxine, bones funny, funny quotes. 2 I'm Still on the Right Side of the Grass As long as you're still breathing, you can use this reply. Dont let your mind wander. Going strong. Should I consider that a marriage proposal from you? Alright so far, but there is plenty of time for things to get bad. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); Some Funny Responses to Everyday Questions. Maybe the reply is just taking a long time to come back. *sips wine/tea*. Her sessions aim to bring about transformation in her clients lives, perspectives, and relationships. While I'd love to give you the technique behind his funny comeback I can't. He may simply be one of the quickest minds in the West. Check-in later and well find out if I did or not. If you are in a coma, then that is a valid excuse for not texting back. Still, the ghosters ghost on. How To Answer "Why Are You Single?": 33 Ideas - Elite Daily Who knows, they might just do it. But it can be funny. Im still waiting for my Superman/Wonder Woman. You don't need to say it. Are you flirting with me right now? Definitely will catch your casual convo counterpart off guard and will probably bring a chuckle. 1. Sarcastic response: Express the appropriate level of enthusiasm, then let this handsome, cheeky British man (aka Jimmy from You're The Worst) do the talking: 3. However, I dont recall anything about morons. [Read: How to have playful banter and keep the flirting alive forever]. Synonyms for Still Alive (other words and phrases for Still Alive). You grow on peoplebut then again, so does cancer. Thank you Fred. All you have to do is save this page, or commit to memory some of our favorite insults from the following list, and youll be all set. All jokes aside, death is one of the few "sure things" in life, and it's also something all of us have in common. (Heres What To Do), Roommate Sleeps in Living Room All The Time! Perfect for that BRB, shower text that they never BRBd to. Nowadays, potential mates need money. If you want, Ill give you a discount, baby. 100 Good Comebacks Best Funny, Witty Comebacks Ever - Parade 13. Everyone knows a happy dog wags his tail, so if you're feeling happy and joyful, this would be a good response to give to someone asking how you're doing because it's clever and unique. 9. All rights reserved. I dont chase them just to satisfy my sexual desires. There is not always a need to be so funny, witty, or clever. My grandfather had a ton of these. 32. Ever wondered: "What if I'm buried when I'm just in a coma?" My bed only has enough room for me and my dog. I havent met the right one yet. Copyright 2011 - 2023 IncNut Stylecraze Private Limited. Then you die. Tom Lehrer - Wikipedia funny response to are you still alive. 4. It's impossible for things to be perfect. Perhaps you are just such an exciting person. I'm Not Sure How to Answer That!? Another way to say Still Alive? Your friends will expect you to say "fine" or "good," so shake things up by providing an unexpected answer. Also you texted very late; I would think one of my friends were joking or drunk since it's near Halloween. 63. Instead of listening to your opinion, how about I put on some cartoons for you, and get you a juice box? Why not laugh about it and allow it to bring us closer together? You look tired. "Yeah, you're three years late. 90 Sarcastic Quotes for Witty Comebacks Full of Sarcasm - Quote Ambition Here's a 13-second video explaining how Jennifer Lawrence uses this Surprise Theory: Furthermore, he has teaching experience from Aarhus University. Id hug and kiss you if you were single, just like me. For example, when people expect you to say yes, you say no; when people wish you to say a big number, you give a tiny number. Sorry, life. [Read: 48 smart and sarcastic lines and quotes that kick ass!]. Theres too much Ghostbusters texting potential to not take advantage of the pun-tastic opportunity. Depending on your mood and relationship with the person, you can go one of many ways. My guardian angel be like 2. 48 smart and sarcastic lines and quotes that kick ass! Cookie Notice There might be little things that go wrong throughout your life, but at least you're still living it. No, keep talking. I am doing wellor that could be my anti-depressants speaking. This does not seem right. 10. Are you Jamaican? This person is taking so long to reply, you will be waiting for geology to change before you get one. Here are 55 funny coronavirus memes that will make you LOL. [Read: How to be a fun texter and make anyone laugh while reading your texts]. Because apparently, you need to go outside and talk to people to date. 2023 The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers on this website. "If at first, you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.". When I eat cake, I flip it upside-down just so I can lick the icing off the plate! What's your favourite "I'd rather die" response alternative? I'm glad to know that you're alive.".

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